A Kiss is Just a Kiss Read online

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Yes, you do. You want to run the family business about as much as I want to get a butterfly tattoo.”

  “You’ve been wanting a butterfly? Wow, I had no idea. I know a guy, and a girl. But maybe we should stick with the guy since I think the girl’s still pissed at me for leaving after we had sex.”

  “You know damn well that I don’t want a butterfly tattoo, and I know you don’t want to run the company.”

  “I don’t have a choice. You refuse to let Dad be in charge, and like he’s always saying, ‘it’s a family business, so family needs to run it’.”

  “Your father is not in control of the company for a very good reason, and you know what that reason it.”

  Oh yeah, I do. My father is a pompous ass and likes to forget that he wasn’t always rich. My grandparents never forgot where they came from—they still held on to their old house to remind them of where they came from. They may have moved onto acres of property, but every year on their anniversary they stayed there in that old house. Just another reason to love them, and why I have to do what’s needed of me.

  “You need to retire and enjoy yourself.”

  “I enjoyed myself for many years. I love the business, and I loved traveling with your grandmother even more. When I retire, I’ll be bored.”

  “The doctor said you have to slow down.”

  “I know, and I will. Just maybe not with you at the helm.”

  “If not me, who?”

  “Your friend Easton seems like he would want to run the company.”

  “East would love to run it, but he’s not technically family and, well, you know he’s gay.”

  “I only care about the first part of that sentence. The rest is irrelevant.”

  “To you, but not to my dad, or other people we do business with.”

  “There’s a reason I never took our business public, Kye, and that’s because I don’t give a rat’s ass what anyone else thinks. Your father spends his days on the golf course, so why should his opinion matter? As for the people we sell to? Well, we’ve got others begging to take their place, and you know it. The demand for our products far outweighs what I’m willing to supply.”

  He’s right about that. The chocolate my Gramps developed after marrying my Gram is the most sought after in the world. Many say it’s better than most of the European offerings, even. The most luxurious hotels, restaurants, and stores have it, but there are hundreds, if not thousands, more hoping to be included on the list of 1,000. 1,000 businesses, each committing to buying at least $100,000 of our chocolates per year.

  My father has tried to pressure Gramps to expand, but he won’t. My grandparents set that goal of how many places they wanted to carry their product, and when they got to that number, they stopped, despite the overwhelming demand for more. With a limit on production, our company can focus on quality, while still providing a good quantity. We don’t limit the orders from the 1,000—and many order much more than $100,000 per year—we just don’t add more customers. The only way for someone new to get on that list is if someone drops off.

  “Well then, give Easton the reins.”

  “I will, on one condition.”

  “Wait, you’re serious? You’ll really put him in charge, and let me do…something else?”

  “’Something’ like keep building those tiny houses you’ve been selling for the past year?”

  Shit. Wasn’t expecting that. “You know?”

  “Of course I know. Can’t say I’m surprised. You were upgrading your friends’ tree houses from the time you were ten.”

  “I love to build things. I’m sorry, but that’s my passion.”

  “And it can be yours once you find your kiss.”

  “Find my kiss? That’s what you want in exchange for Easton taking my place? I have to kiss someone?”

  “Not just ‘someone’. Your gram and I talked about it in her last days. She seemed to think you might have already had the kiss that changed your life, but you just don’t remember it. We came up with a plan to see if she was right. You find ten women from your past who might have given you the kiss you forgot, but also try and kiss a few new people. I won’t make it an exact ten, because that may not be the right number for the new ones. You have until the annual Employee Appreciation carnival next month.”

  “Next month? And how could I forget a magical kiss like the one you’re talking about? What if I don’t find ‘The One’? You don’t want me to force it, do you?”

  “People forget things all the time, for one reason or another. And no, you can’t fake the kiss, so of course you can’t force anything. If you honestly still think it’s not possible for a kiss to mean anything after you’ve done what we’re asking, then I will still let you off the hook. You have to really believe it, though. And no half-assing the search, because I’ll know if you did.”

  “Gram really thought I’d had it, though, the kiss?”

  “Yes. She said you told her you’d felt it. You kissed someone, and told her you understood what she’d meant.”

  “I did? When? And why can’t I just go find that girl? The one I told her about? Why send me on a quest when she knew who I should kiss already?”

  “Yes, and I don’t know. She wouldn’t tell me. She said you should know, and if you don’t, then you don’t deserve the girl anyway.”

  “But I thought she wanted me to find the kiss?”

  “She did, but I think she was mad that you forgot. You know how ornery she got when she thought any of us were acting dumb.”

  Yeah, I know. I felt that wrath more than once. When I fell out of the tree house I was adding to because I didn’t tie a rope on that time. Or every time I brought a social climber to a party. And let’s not forget the time East and I got so drunk that we woke up naked and spooning next to one of the chocolate vats at the factory. Actually, let’s forget that one. I don’t think anything happened, but I’m also glad the cameras weren’t on that night.

  “Okay. I’ll do it. I’ll try and find the mystery woman who apparently rocked my world, or find a new one who can get the job done.”

  “It’s not a job,” Gramps tells me, rolling his eyes.

  “No, but it might just get me the one I want.” And give my best friend the one he does, too.

  “I hope so. For everyone’s sake. And also because your father might just faint while driving his golf cart and crash it into the clubhouse again when he finds out.”

  “He was drunk last time he did that. They don’t let him drive anymore.”

  “Well damn, there goes about 40% of the fun in this.”

  “I’ll try to make my 60% even better, just for you.”

  “I’ll be counting on it. Now get out of here. You have plans to make.”

  “Yes sir,” I tell him, giving him a hug before heading out. He’s right about me needing to plan. I need my friends, too.

  Fool

  ME ONCE AND KISS ME TWICE

  “Wait, I get to run the company? Your family’s company? For reals?”

  “Did you just say ‘for reals’?” I ask East raising a mocking eyebrow at him.

  “Yeah, so?”

  “And I was worried that your sexuality would be a problem. Now I know it’s your tween Disney Channel vocabulary that’s going to cause a stir.”

  “So, tell us more about this quest for the perfect kiss,” Bea says, something flashing in her eyes when I look at her. It’s gone before I can analyze exactly what it was, but it leaves me a little unsettled.

  “It’s not the ‘perfect’ kiss I’m supposed to find, it’s the girl attached to the lips that are supposed to let me know she’s the one for me.”

  “You hate kissing. You’ve always said it’s just a means to an end,” she reminds me.

  “Hate is a strong word. I’ve enjoyed a few kisses. I just don’t think they’re magical, or life-changing. Except, apparently one time I did. At least that’s what my Gram told
my Gramps.”

  “You don’t remember it? At all?” East asks, and I shake my head.

  “Of course he doesn’t. He’s kissed the whole city, plus more than a few foreign girls. I don’t think a month is going to cut it.”

  “Wow, Bea. The claws are out today, aren’t they?”

  “Children, focus,” East says. “Since most kisses haven’t meant anything, we can rule out most of the population. Narrowing it down to ten shouldn’t be too hard.”

  “Plus the new ones, but that should be easy, too.”

  “You do remember some of those good kisses you talked about, don’t you?”

  “Kind of. I mean, I remember kissing some girls, so that means something, right?”

  Bea rolls her eyes. “Why am I friends with the two of you again?”

  “Because no one else would embrace your disdain for romance and love the way we do,” East says, tweaking her nose.

  “Or maybe it’s because I’ve saved you two from the psycho girls—and guys—who aren’t happy with a few hours of fun.”

  “There’s that, too. You’re the best, Bumble,” I tell her, using the nickname only I call her.

  “For the last time, my name is spelled B-E-A, not B-E-E.”

  “And you point is?” I ask, trying to look innocently confused.

  “Let’s just start making a plan before I give in to the urge to punch you.”

  “Before you do that, you never answered me, Kye. I really get to run the company if this works?”

  “Yes, and I get to keep building instead of ending my year off after graduate school in an office, wearing a damn suit and tie. It’s a win-win for both of us.”

  “What do I get out of it?” Bea mumbles so low I almost don’t hear it.

  “Our undying gratitude.”

  “I’ve got lifetimes full of that after all the times I’ve bailed the two of you out.”

  “How about we find you a guy?” East asks her, a wicked gleam in his eye.

  “I think that ship sailed long ago,” she responds.

  “What? Wait? When did you become a lesbian?”

  “I am not a lesbian!” she yells, jumping back like I’ve hit her.

  “It’s okay. Really. East’s already flying the flag, loud and proud. You know it’s cool if you like the ladies, too. Maybe you’ll even find one of the ones I have to turn away for a second time.”

  “I have to punch him,” she tells East. “Please let me punch him now.”

  He nods. “Yeah, I got nothing. Knock yourself—I mean him—out.”

  I’m still processing all of this when her fist hits my jaw and I tumble backwards. I’m not knocked out, but fuck if that didn’t hurt. Girl has a mean right hook, which shouldn’t be a surprise since East and I taught her how to hit when we were kids. But still, dammit. Did she have to hit me? She said she didn’t want us to look for a guy for her, so why wouldn’t I assume she’s a lesbian? I make a simple observation, and now I have to seek medical attention.

  “I need a doctor!” I say, holding my injured face.

  “You don’t need a doctor, wimp,” East tells me. Where’s the compassion? Or even the love?

  “She hit me!”

  “Woman up, and get some ice,” Bea says, rolling her eyes.

  “I’m not a woman, thank you very much.”

  “Obviously not. We have babies and survive it—you can’t take a little punch.”

  “You don’t hit a guy’s face like that. What if I’m disfigured,” I tell her, getting up to look at my reflection in my steel stove hood. “It’s already getting purple.”

  “Here. Put this on your face, and get a grip,” East tells me, slapping an ice pack against my chest.

  “I need more than this. It’s my face,” I remind him.

  He hands me a bottle of beer, and now I’m ready to tackle the list. Beer can make almost anything better.

  Bea sits as far from me as possible in my living room, glaring at me like I’m the one who did the punching. Women! This is why I’ve never kept one in my life for longer than a suck, or a fuck—they get angrier when you accept them for who they are than they do if you reject them.

  “Let’s get started,” East says, trying to diffuse some of the tension in the room. I’m still not happy with him for telling her to hit me, but I need his help. If I’m being honest, I need them both, but I’m not ready for that kind of soul searching just yet.

  “Okay, right. The first girl I can remember is Kian.”

  “The class princess from fourth grade, Kian?” Bea asks with a sneer.

  “Yes. She was pretty, and she smelled good.”

  “She was mean, and she repeatedly pretended I was a boy because I played with the two of you.”

  “She’s got you there. I still can’t believe you dated her for a week,” East says.

  “We passed notes, ate at the place with the pizza and the mouse, and kissed a few times. Dating was pretty damn easy back then. Nice and easy.”

  “She called me a boy, asshole! You kissed that little bitch after she called me a boy!”

  “She was just intuitive. She probably sensed that you were into her, and just didn’t know how to deal with that feeling back then. Honestly, you’re not dealing with those feelings too well now.”

  “Dude. Do you want her to punch you again? She’s not into girls.”

  “You’re not?” I ask, confused, because I thought we’d already established that she was.

  “No,” she says, quietly. “While you were coming to terms with my sexuality, I was looking up your girl. She’s a corporate divorce lawyer. She looks like a shark in her picture.”

  “Let me see,” East tells her. She turns her phone to him, and he rears back. “Whoa! She really does look like a shark. I feel like all those white teeth are going to jump off the screen and bite me.”

  “Is she a great white or a nurse shark?” I ask, needing to know just what I’m in for.

  “She’s still got smooth mocha skin, brown eyes, but her hair is in soft waves. I can objectively say she looks hot. What do you think, Bea?”

  She growls at him in response as he chuckles. I motion for the phone, and she tosses it to me so I can look for myself. “Nice. I’ll just have to be careful not to get bit when I kiss her. Unless she’s the one, and then I guess she can bite me.”

  “Bite me,” Bea says.

  “Don’t ask for things you don’t truly want.”

  I get a one-fingered salute as she grabs her phone and stomps out the front door. “Was it something I said?”

  “It’s lots of things you say, Kye. Lots and lots of things.”

  “Really?”

  “Just forget it for now. How do you want this to go down?”

  “I’m thinking I’ll throw on a suit, and put her on retainer.”

  “You don’t need a divorce lawyer.”

  “Yet. I don’t need one yet. If I find this miracle kiss, I’m going to need a pre-nup, so why not be prepared?”

  “Wow. Such a romantic.”

  “One of has to be practical.”

  “Says the tiny house builder.”

  “To the foam party fucking fanatic.”

  “We all have our freak,” he says with a shrug. “And I usually just get blown, or do the blowing, in the foam. Fucking comes later.”

  “Semantics.”

  “You’re not really trying to school me, are you? Do you want me to remind you about the freaky escapades you’ve shared with me over the years?”

  “Touché.”

  “I take it that’s a no?”

  “Just help me pick out a suit.”

  “Not all gay men know fashion.”

  “Yeah, but you’re one of the ones who does.”

  “I expect a new Armani suit for my trouble.”

  “You can buy your own damn suit. You have a trust fund, too.”

  “But it’s so much better when a hot guy buys things for me.”

  I just stop and stare at him. “J
ust no.”

  “Too much?”

  “Way beyond too much. Get in there, and do your best work.”

  “My best work is done outside of the closet. Just ask anyone.”

  “I’d rather not. Go!”

  I love this guy, and I love Bea, too. We met as kids who were hiding out at a fancy party, trying not to get our cheeks pinched again. As kids, we stuck together against bullies—well, except for my momentary slip with Kian, but if she’s my soulmate, I should be forgiven for my lapse in loyalty. As teens we bonded over vapid debutantes and drugged out party boys. In college, we all majored in business, going through all six years of school together. Me, so I could do my duty to my family, even though I just want to build things, namely little houses. East, because he loves it even though his family has pretended he doesn’t exist since he came out. And Bea, because she wants to run a non-profit, also against family wishes. They don’t want her to run their business, but they do want her to marry someone who will. She’ll never do that, and it’s their loss. My friends are awesome; magic kiss or not, I know they’ll always have my back.

  Kian

  THE IGNITION

  Getting an appointment with Kian was easier than I thought it would be. The lady who answered the phone sucked in a breath when I gave her my name. Since the whole world thinks I’m the heir, and they don’t know that I’m going to be the spare, doors open a lot easier than they should sometimes. And yeah, I take advantage of that to get into restaurants and clubs when I forget to call ahead. I may not want the title, but the perks are pretty nice sometimes. Like right now.

  East nearly fainted when he saw my new Brioni suit. My mom insisted I needed at least one, so I went out and got it, knowing my best friend would approve. I just didn’t think he’d try to steal it. There was a tug of war, ending with me reminding him once again that he can buy his own. He finally let go because he was worried we’d tear the fabric.

  We walk into the sleek lobby, filled with chrome and glass, and I nod at my friend. “This is nice. Not my kind of thing, necessarily, but I could make do.”

  “But can she deal with yours? Tiny houses are all the rage, but building them isn’t exactly prestigious.”